Meaghan Thomas

Strange But True New Year’s 2020 Fortunes…What’s In Store for You?

We hosted a New Year’s Eve party and I wanted to make fun homemade fortunes for the guests. I wrote “strange but true” fortunes on little pieces of paper and rolled them into tiny scrolls, tying them with twine and put them in a little bowl for guests to pick through the night. They were a hit!

I’m sharing my homemade weird, funny and strange fortunes so you can get your fortune too! Just pick a number 1-22 ….Got it a number? Great… scroll down to see what your fortune is for 2020.

the fortune when you unwrap the scroll

Pick A Number (1-22) to Reveal Your Fortune…

Got your number? Scroll to read your fortune!

  1. In the year 2020: You’ll become a reality TV star…on America’s Most Wanted.
  2. In the year 2020: You’ll become more open to trying new things, like tennis and bank robberies. #StretchBeforeBoth
  3. In the year 2020: Mariah Carey will pick you to star with her in Glitter 2, the 20th Anniversary. #DontDoIt
  4. In the year 2020: You’ll meet John Travolta. Unfortunately all he’ll want to talk about is his “underrated” performance in Battlefield Earth.
  5. In the year 2020: You’ll discover something hidden in your home…unfortunately it may lead to a series of rabies shots.
  6. In the year 2020: You’ll sit next to Kevin Costner on a plane. Unfortunately he’ll talk about Water World the whole time.
  7. In the year 2020: You’ll receive a lot of unexpected admiration…sadly, it’s mostly from pigeons.
  8. In the year 2020: You’ll share a Lyft ride with Bill Murray. He’ll spend the entire ride apologizing for Garfield: The Movie.
  9. In the year 2020: In a surprise turn of events, you’ll quit your job in 2020 to purse your new passion – making sweaters out of cat hair. #ItsNeverTooLate
  10. In the year 2020: Jennifer Lopez will try to redeem herself by writing, directing and starring in Gigli II. You’ll be the one person who absolutely loves it. #NoShame2020
  11. In the year 2020: You’ll discover the wonderful world of dog cosplay. You’ll become well known for you and your pup’s rendition of the mom/daughter duo from Gilmore Girls. You’ll lose some friends, but gain dozens of Twitter followers.
  12. In the year 2020: You’ll finally get the respect you deserve, except it’s from Generation Z’ers who only call you Sir and Ma’am because they think you’re super old.
  13. In the year 2020: You’ll meet George Clooney and you’ll talk all night long…about his “unappreciated” performance in Batman & Robin.
  14. In the year 2020: You’ll surprise yourself by falling in love with Paul Blart: Mall Cop 3. It will start a love affair with Kevin James, which will end in a restraining order by mid September.
  15. In the year 2020: You’ll discover a hidden talent. In 2021, the authorities will finally arrest you for it. #EnjoyItWhileYouCan
  16. In the year 2020: You’ll be thrilled to sit next to David Cross at a basketball game. Unfortunately he’ll only talk about his distain for the Chipmunk’s movie, Chipwrecked. With every breath he’ll become more enraged. It will get weird. #DontMentionAlvin
  17. You’ll become a reality TV star…on Live PD.
  18. Run.     Now.
  19. In the year 2020: You’ll sit next to Robert De Niro on a plane. He will have had a few drinks. Before you know it, he’ll be sobbing on your shoulder, crying about his shame for starring in Dirty Grandpa.
  20. In the year 2020: You’ll unknowingly be filmed dancing at a wedding. Your “tremendous” dancing ability will go viral and you’ll become a bigger hit than that “Gangnam Style” guy. You’ll be a guest on the The View, and your life will never be the same again.
  21. In the year 2020: You’ll find a time portal. Please use it to make sure Nickelback never happens.
  22. In the year 2020: You’ll have a pleasant encounter with the third kind. You’ll become a regular guest on Ancient Aliens. You’ll lose a few close-minded friends, but gain dozens of Instagram followers.

Happy New Year! May all your dreams come true.

My wish is we finally get rid of Donald Trump and Mitch McConnell this year. I put all that energy out there as I decorated for our #DumpTrump #DitchMitch themed New Year’s Eve Party in Louisville, KY… (the two pottery pieces were done by the amazingly talented Wayne Ferguson, who has a shop at the Mellwood Art Center in Louisville, KY).

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